The Perfect Christmas Present
The holiday season is fast approaching, and before the Black Friday rush at the local shopping outlets I want to let you in on what THE perfect Christmas present is.
Olympic Lifting shoes.
Yea, I know. Perfect and you’re ready to go shopping.
Wait, why are you staring at me with that dumb look on your face? Isn’t this self explanatory?
Ok, well this is a two part answer. First I’ll talk to the women folk, so guys leave the room or just scroll past the next paragraph.
For the ladies:
Well hello ladies. I’m going to be frank here. Buy you’re men Olympic lifting shoes because they will help make them stronger. Here are some of the many reasons why you need your man to be stronger:
2. You’re getting stronger and its embarrassing to be able to open the jars your gentlemen caller cannot
3. All men want to get stronger, if not they are what’s colloquially known as “fancy men”
4. On second thought, they are not men at all
5. Every time the man in your life accidentally puts on your jeans and they fit a kitten commits ritualistic suicide
6. Did I already mention Zombies
7. Oly shoes will help stabilize the knees during heavy lifting and help prevent injury
8. You can give the gift of increased dorsiflexion that they always wanted
Now girls, go away and go buy the shoes or talk about purses or put make up on house pets or whatever ya’ll do when no one is watching.
Are you gone? Its hard to see over the internets.
Guys come back.
You remember that episode of the Simpson’s where Homer bought Marge a bowling ball that said “Homer” for her birthday?
Foiled again womens!
Trick question! If you said no you’re a girl and you need to go away
Here’s how this work:
1. Buy Oly shoes and encourage squatting
2. They squat
3. You get this to look at
Things I like more than Squat Butt: nothing to include bacon
So in summation: give the gift that keeps on giving and buy some Olympic Lifting shoes for Christmas.
Also, than I wouldn’t make you take your shoes off on strength days.
Shoe links (in order from most to least expensive)